tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.comments2012-09-16T08:19:15.444-07:00A PLACE TO TALK ABOUT RAPEBar L.http://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comBlogger274125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-70063531224206342932012-09-16T08:19:15.444-07:002012-09-16T08:19:15.444-07:00Lizzie, I'm so, so sorry to hear about this. ...Lizzie, I'm so, so sorry to hear about this. Its like the person steals part of you soul when they do this. I wish I could tell you I coped with it in a healthy way, but I let it lead me down a dark path of using drugs and sleeping around and trying to pretend it didn't bother me. So you are already dealing with it better than I did because you know you need to talk about it. If you want to write me privately my email is in in my profile. My suggestion for you (actually its more like a plea - I beg you to please do this) is to talk to a professional counselor, maybe start with your school counselor and ask him/her to help you find other help. Also, why did you not tell your dad? I know I didn't tell mine either so I totally understand. <br /><br />One thing I promise you, you CAN find the will to go on. The pain, the anger, the shame, humiliation, the sense of despair - all those things will lessen with time. Right now is the hardest time of all its still so new and painful. I don't think we ever heal completely from something like this, but you heal enough to still have a good life. Don't let this bastard win. Don't let his violent acts steal your life from you. Please talk to someone, please write me!Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-88204357276482637272012-09-15T18:17:33.594-07:002012-09-15T18:17:33.594-07:00I was raped at 14 as well I don't know anyone ...I was raped at 14 as well I don't know anyone that's been in the same situation as me and I don't know how to deal with it. I'm only 15 now, my dad still doesn't know, I have to see my rapists face everyday at school, my closest "friends" don't even believe me and I'm just so lonely. Please tell me how you made it through the years. If I don't get help, I don't think I can make it much longer. I get so sensitive about the topic and I'm usually not sensitive about anything. Noone around me knows about it and they treat me like shit and it just adds on to the endless pain. Please help, I can't find the will to go on.Lizzie S.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-90495407605124244792012-07-29T03:52:43.640-07:002012-07-29T03:52:43.640-07:00He certainly was not an "innocent" young...He certainly was not an "innocent" young teenager.<br />That poor little girl is living proof he is a goddamm monster..<br /><br />What did he think was going to happen, that he'd never get caught??<br /><br />Playing his weird fucking mind games probably like the majority of chomos in the world.......<br />He knows right & wrong; now he's paying for the wrong.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-70185974262859355462012-07-02T20:06:45.620-07:002012-07-02T20:06:45.620-07:00His mother is responsible for arranging the rape o...His mother is responsible for arranging the rape of the teenage daughters of Orange County.<br />I suspect he got an "early start" and there are numerous rapes of children under 14 in this case.<br />He was not an "innocent" young teenager.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-77602377215828689292012-05-31T17:22:44.391-07:002012-05-31T17:22:44.391-07:00honestly i'm just using this to talk about my ...honestly i'm just using this to talk about my own experience because i can't tell anyone about what happened to me. my ex boyfriend, the one i loved, the only person i thought i could really trust, forced me to perform oral sex on him. he asked me to, and i said no. and he kept asking, and i kept saying no, and he shoved my head down, and i fought to keep it up, and he kept asking, and shoving, and asking, and shoving, and i kept saying no.but i was getting scared, i hadn't seen him act like this before. he wasn't being himself, and he was being really pushy, so i did it as fast as possible to get it over with and went home. he called me and apologized as soon as i got home, and i forgave him. we didn't talk about it again. i never told anyone. i stayed with him, i convinced myself it didn't happen, it was a bad dream. then, one of my friends told us about a similar thing that happened to her, and he got pissed about it. and i remembered. and i wondered why it was okay for him to do it to me,the girl he claimed to love, but not for someone else to do to a different girl. why was it okay for it to happen to me, but not her? i didn't talk about it, though. it just stayed in my brain until i could bury it and smother it in denial. he always made me feel like i wasn't good enough for him. now i have such a strong revulsion to (even consensual) oral sex i can't hear or read or talk about it without feeling scared and hurt and dirty for the whole day. i don't think he realizes the severity of his actions, and i don't know if he ever will. and that's scary.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-65133211465605380032012-04-26T11:06:52.812-07:002012-04-26T11:06:52.812-07:00I couldn't agree more, that's well put!I couldn't agree more, that's well put!crime scene cleanuphttp://www.bioprollc.com/tempe-crime-scene-clean-up.phpnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-1755224738292488552011-11-12T08:52:50.599-08:002011-11-12T08:52:50.599-08:00HM,
Exactly, very well said. I do believe that ...HM, <br /><br />Exactly, very well said. I do believe that there are a lot of students at Penn who agree with us.Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-32873459253531657222011-11-12T06:00:57.233-08:002011-11-12T06:00:57.233-08:00I hope McQueary goes to jail. He walked away inste...I hope McQueary goes to jail. He walked away instead of beating the shit out of Sandusky when he saw him raping the boy. <br /><br />He even made a JOKE about being in protective custody while on the phone to his players. (he wasn't) A joke? How dare he. Send him to jail, see if that's a joke. He enabled a pedophile to complete the job. <br /><br />Paterno deserves jail time. He should have done more. A child was RAPED. <br /><br />I hope Penn State loses their football program for a good while. Yes, the students will suffer but they don't GET it. <br /><br />I don't give a whit about their "big football program" since they didn't care about the victims.Have Myelin?https://www.blogger.com/profile/05704037582961814202noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-25658730312155122422011-10-16T10:44:00.964-07:002011-10-16T10:44:00.964-07:00He has not changed, he no longer is employed, not ...He has not changed, he no longer is employed, not with the babys Mom, still with the long time girlfriend, and cheats on the side. If you could only see his attitude to people. He is so self righteous.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-36405379916796973932011-10-15T17:36:13.383-07:002011-10-15T17:36:13.383-07:00Anon, I just read that in another comment (not sur...Anon, I just read that in another comment (not sure if it was you) and all I can say is God help that poor child born with those two as parents (the mother obviously has issues to get involved with K.) Of course they say anyone can change, one can only hope (but somehow he doesn't seem like the type that will).Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-76182712636389362832011-10-15T13:20:41.222-07:002011-10-15T13:20:41.222-07:00He is a Father now.He is a Father now.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-14970694796999947822011-10-03T21:59:18.507-07:002011-10-03T21:59:18.507-07:00He slept with another mans wife and ruined their m...He slept with another mans wife and ruined their marriage. The outcome of that situation is horrible.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-6552991075232951592011-09-28T11:01:02.813-07:002011-09-28T11:01:02.813-07:00Many, I'm so sorry you feel this way. I'...Many, I'm so sorry you feel this way. I've been suicidal several times, I know that feeling that nothing could possibly make me feel better so why bother continuing? I hope that you do find something that helps you, whatever it may be. Its sad to know you are out there feeling this way.<br /><br />Three years ago I lost one of my best friends to suicide. He couldn't find peace or contentment. The dark cloud was with him at all times. It was shocking that he actually went through with it, but not surprising. I miss him so much.<br /><br />I'm glad you shared here. You can write me at my email if you want someone to talk to.Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-11148483697605712162011-09-28T10:56:20.164-07:002011-09-28T10:56:20.164-07:00Many, I agree completely. Its just mind boggling ...Many, I agree completely. Its just mind boggling to me how anyone would want to blame a victim. And in the case of Jacee - WTF? I certainly hope if she reads any comments by these lunatics that she realizes their opinions are based in ignorance and meanness.Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-28254041659894514262011-09-25T10:52:33.110-07:002011-09-25T10:52:33.110-07:00It doesn't surprise me that mainstream is blam...It doesn't surprise me that mainstream is blaming the victim. This is not a new concept in the world we live in. People blame kidnapped victims all the time for not 'getting away'. <br /><br />Yahoo news had an article on Jaycee Dugard suing the government. In the comments section you will see NUMEROUS people blaming her for not getting out sooner. People blaming the parents for letting an 11 yr old walk to the bus stop (while step dad was near) alone. People blaming everyone but the monsters who stole her and her childhood. <br />This is not a new concept. <br /><br />Any man, woman or child should be able to walk down ANY street NAKED and not fear being raped or murdered. What ANYONE wears should have NO baring on what someone else does to them. The one and ONLY guilty person is the person who raped and killed her!!many.in.onehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01391343160415735879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-61690644863290405052011-09-25T10:37:34.186-07:002011-09-25T10:37:34.186-07:00I read his letter and i know exactly what this man...I read his letter and i know exactly what this man was feeling. I feel it every single day of my life. I wouldn't say i'm suicidal but if i did die i'm ok with that. <br /><br />The words he wrote I could write myself. Alone, disabled and beyond sick of this life. <br /><br />People claim if he would have gotten help and medication he would be better. I've been in Therapy for more years then I care. I've been on medications too many to count. I still wish this life was over. <br /><br />I'm sorry another human (Bill) had to endure life like I do every day.many.in.onehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01391343160415735879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-5036129048447401532011-09-19T18:24:36.161-07:002011-09-19T18:24:36.161-07:00Yep, circumstance is important, and it's hard ...Yep, circumstance is important, and it's hard to tell, but circumstances don't matter if the survivor said "no".<br /><br />I always say "Even if the most gorgeous girl in the world is naked in front of you, it doesn't matter, she still has to consent."Mike aka MonolithTMAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08385705390882035829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-43406092287848977132011-09-19T18:20:33.683-07:002011-09-19T18:20:33.683-07:00Consent is definitely different, even at the teena...Consent is definitely different, even at the teenage level. Certainly it is still wrong, but I imagine less scarring.<br /><br />Teenage boys are definitely wanting to experiment with sex.Mike aka MonolithTMAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08385705390882035829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-25618454735890243632011-09-19T14:14:10.274-07:002011-09-19T14:14:10.274-07:00Mike, I was going to bring this up. I'm glad ...Mike, I was going to bring this up. I'm glad you did. Teachers having sex with their high school teachers is morally wrong and illegal. Yet, I see that at a a bit less destructive to the victim if its a teenager who consents. Teenage boys usually don't report these crimes, their parents report it when they find out. But these younger kids - who knows what emotional damage is done when a woman their mother's age (or older) touches them sexually or forces them to touch her. I hope she gets a long sentence. If not, I will be pissed off and let my voice be hears. Of course she's innocent until proven guilty by law, but in my mind she's guilty. The law doesn't always work on the side of justice (i.e. Casey Anthony).Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-48406199248539409302011-09-19T14:06:22.979-07:002011-09-19T14:06:22.979-07:00Mike, I'm glad you see the point that is being...Mike, I'm glad you see the point that is being made here. I got this from a site that had tons of comments arguing about whether or not it was a good analogy, they didn't seem too interested in what it said, only in if it was said correctly. I GET IT! This is why I did not report my second rape when I was was an underage teen with a fake ID out drinking in a bar (the guy asked me out to his VAN to smoke pot, and that's when it happened). Anyhow I carried the blame for that for years telling myself it was my own damn fault even though he forced me, I fought with him, and he left me on the side of a road after he was done with me. It wasn't well into my adulthood that I was able to look at it objectively and see the truth. But, if I would have reported it back then - do you think the cops would have taken me seriously? I'll never know.Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-30745432079075966132011-09-19T12:17:53.380-07:002011-09-19T12:17:53.380-07:00I feel that one of the reasons female perps get ig...I feel that one of the reasons female perps get ignored is the "hot for teacher" syndrome. If the adult female is seen in any way as "hot" then a lot of guys see the boy as lucky. Ugh.Mike aka MonolithTMAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08385705390882035829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-66760031362325695952011-09-19T12:03:23.483-07:002011-09-19T12:03:23.483-07:00That's it exactly.That's it exactly.Mike aka MonolithTMAhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08385705390882035829noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-69785015808569522202011-09-18T08:14:05.670-07:002011-09-18T08:14:05.670-07:00Chachi, thank you so much for opening up and shari...Chachi, thank you so much for opening up and sharing this. Its so true. I know many women that would agree with you about not having a normal love life. You're life has been far worse than most!!! To be abused like that at HOME by the people that were suppose to be protecting you from harm...I congratulate you for being able to live as normally as you have. My heart breaks at the thought of what you've been through. I'm so sorry. <br /><br />Keep in touch if you want to.Bar L.https://www.blogger.com/profile/11100008292699584336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-65812859790938065172011-09-17T20:29:33.923-07:002011-09-17T20:29:33.923-07:00Reading all the post brings tears to my eyes. Some...Reading all the post brings tears to my eyes. Some post open up old wounds.<br />I grew up in an abusive home both physical and sexual abuse. I have a burn scar given to me at two yrs old and my first horrific memory of sexual abuse was at 4. I grew up in a home where a moral compass just didnt exist. After years of battleing the shame, guilt, I am left with the inability to fully trust anyone (except my children). Even then I keep (them) my children at distance. <br /><br />The comment someone made about never feeling normal (its true). <br />Rape , sexual abuse is never easy to talk about. Whats worse their are stupid people (idiots) who actually think we provoke it. I ask how does a 4 year provoke rape. I can sympathize with all of you. I have never had a normal relationship... I always end it before it gets too close. I hope none of you women wind up like me.<br />I've worked hard to give my kids a Good Life. And was overprotective.<br /><br />I can only find peace by being alone. Relationships scare me. I hate being hugged or touched and at the same time I want to be with someone. I'm 49 and for me Love never existed. People who have never been raped say things like<br />Why dont you just get over it. I they grew up in a home where I was abused multiple times. Just to be violated again as a adult then they would understand. The pain never leaves you it is somehow embedded. Like my burn scar the skin is healed but the scar forever remains.Chachinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918766137440398685.post-47789911408062350422011-09-17T18:47:24.565-07:002011-09-17T18:47:24.565-07:00Well worded, Daelda.
Mainsteam- your opinion sick...Well worded, Daelda.<br /><br />Mainsteam- your opinion sickens me.Candacenoreply@blogger.com